


Once In A Lifetime

by Code520



Category: Chinese Actor RPF, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Car Accidents, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Memory Loss, One Shot, Past Character Death, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:55:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29562213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Code520/pseuds/Code520
Summary: Wang Yibo is a normal guy that ended up in the hospital after a motorbike accident. His roommate is Xiao Zhan, a guy who has been in comma for weeks. One day, he wakes up. However, he says his name is Wei Ying and that the patient beside him is Lan Zhan. Wang Yibo goes along with it because the doctor told him so, but slowly, his brain began to remember. Are they Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo or Wei Ying and Lan Zhan?*****Day 6 forZSWW/LSFY weekwith prompt soulmates.
Relationships: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan | Sean
Comments: 4
Kudos: 70
Collections: ZSWW/LSFY Week 2021





	Once In A Lifetime

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for any possible grammar mistake, English is not my mother tongue.
> 
> Also, sorry for any medical inaccuracy.

A beautiful place, hidden between mountains, surrounded by dense clouds that gave it a mysterious vibe. GusuLan was one of the most gorgeous places he had been in. Surrounded by nature combined with forest, lakes and even springs that fell through high hills. Animals dared to walk around freely, thanking the silence that people maintained daily. Instead, even if that place looked as the paradise to find the peace and inner calmness, for Wei Wuxian, that looked as a torture. With thousands of rules, he had two options, or following each one of them or breaking them all and having fun around. And as the second one was funnier, he went along with it. At first, he drove Lan Qiren, the uncle of the leader of sect, crazy with his impertinent behaviour. Meanwhile, Lan Xichen, said leader, just tried to lower his need of opposing the rules with flawless kindness and humble words. However, his brother, Lan Wangji, hated him so deeply that they were constantly fighting no matter where. In the spring, in the library, in any place where Wei Wuxian would be able to get him so angry that Lan Wangji didn’t even care he was actually breaking some rules in the path.

Actually, that made that rebel boy enjoy his acts even more, really liking that stubborn young boy that barely talked or expressed any single emotion, just as cold as the ice, sharp as a knife, but loyal and fair as no one else in the five sects. That was why Wei Wuxian chose to try to be his friend during the stance in GusuLan for studies. However, Lan Wangji refused his company categorically. Naïve of him for thinking he would get tired and would stop eventually because slowly, their lives got twisted together.

*****

Being trapped in a cave, with the Xuanwu creature trying to eat and make them disappear from that world as simple as just with one bite, they had to remain together, hurt and waiting for the help they weren't sure if it would arrive. Lan Wangji had a broken leg, being worsened by the long walk Wen Chao, the son of the leader of the Wen sect, obligated them to do in order to find the creature. At that moment, the Wen sect was using the sons of every sect to carry on with their dirty plans to control all the sects. That was why they were there, after a horrible fail in the hunt of Xuanwu, they got trapped after helping everyone to get out of there. And now, Wei Wuxian was trying to heal that leg that was causing an unbearable pain in Lan Wangji. Yet his face remained just with a slight frown, not showing he was suffering.

Wei Wuxian made up a plan after recovering as much as they could so they would get out of there alive. But for that he needed the help of Lan Wangji. Putting aside their differences, after facing the death with his own eyes and figuring out one of the most powerful tools in the cultivation world, they got to kill that creature until their strengths were collapsing. Indeed, Wei Wuxian fainted and Lan Wangji was the one healing him this time. Transmitting him his own energy, his fingers held his wrist gently as the only thing Wei Wuxian could think was how boring that guy was. Then, just a soft melody was mumbled.

*****

A whole sect destroyed. His own sect into flames. The Lotus Pier now was ashes. And all was his fault. If he hadn't behaved like that, now Madame Yu and Jiang Fengmian, his adopting parents, would be alive, his sect wouldn't have been consumed by the fire and Wen Chao with his slut wouldn't be celebrating the death of his family. Now, with Jiang Cheng, his younger brother, broken by the pain, and his older sister, Jiang Yanli, being ill, he had to save them from the claws of the Wen sect before they would kill them. However, their discliples were everywhere, looking one by one. And when Wei Wuxian wanted to notice the reality around him, he was being thrown to the Burial Mounts by Wen Zhuliu, the dog of Wen Chao, after having saved Jiang Cheng from the enemy's hands, recovered the corpses of their parents and having transferred his golden core to his own brother after having lost it.

Still, when Wei Wuxian was being thrown, falling into the desperation of thousands of hungry souls that couldn't escape that place filled with resentment and hatred, he could only thought about his siblings, about his sect, about Lan Wangji. Now, without even a golden core, he had nothing to fight. How could he protect them? How could he keep the promise he did to Madame Yu of protecting them? He had nothing. How could he survive? If he had that sword, he would do anything to get out of there.

*****

He was back, taking his revenge. Life for life. Being in front of Wen Chao, feeling the panic in his eyes, feeling how he was dying just by the fear his mere presence could create in him. And he wasn't wrong. With Wen Zhuliu dead behind, now he was alone. No one would save him and his chances decreased when Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji appeared in that house too. The meeting after three months being disappeared was complicated. Mainly because he had become what Lan Wangji hated the most. The evil. Using dark methods to attack the resentment with more sorrows from the deads, Wei Wuxian was sure he would hate him. That was why it was better to make him understand their paths couldn’t be connected anymore. Yet the last gaze they exchanged made his heart shake into the pain of being unable to tell him. After all, his place was beside his bother and sister, assuring the counterattack against the Wen sect was a success.

*****

After showing his real power, the new path in the Demonic Cultivation thanks to the Yin Hu Fu wasn't welcomed by many, not to say by anyone. Daily he was said why he was using Chen Qing, that flute he had fabricated by himself back in the Burial Mounts, instead of Suibian, the sword he had been using since he was old enough to grab it. No one knew it was because he couldn’t and that way was his only source to exist and cultivate. Yet he didn’t say anything, just putting random excuses even to Lan Wangji every time he insisted in returning to the correct path. Over and over again. But Wei Wuxian started to wonder which the correct path was. What was right and wrong. And slowly, those questions created doubts into Lan Wangji, that along with Jiang Yanli, were the only ones who really cared about him instead of just criticizing his actions by just pure rebellion.

*****

Realizing that even if the Wen sect was over, they had another enemy that was trying to follow the same steps called the Jin sect. Wei Wuxian opposed categorically to allow such cruel actions against a clan from the Wen sect that were being tortured and used as slaves. His two friends were in there, Wen Qin and Wen Ning, two siblings dedicated to the art of healing, that along with dozens of old people and even a kid, were obligated to work and mistrated day by day. Wei Wuxian decided to help Wen Qin to find her brother and her family. However, finding Wen Ning dead, that made him took a decision whose consequences would be unfixable in his life.

In the Qionqi Road, under the heavy rain that made breathing hard, his eyes met Lan Wangji's, who was the only one there, trying to stop him from what he was going to do by saving the ones who were supposedly the enemy. However, Wei Wuxian was tired of being the bad guy because others said so and because his new techniques didn’t follow the traditional path. He made a promise beside him of always helping the weak back in GusuLan, so he wasn't going to break it. Yet, when Lan Wangji accepted his decision and walked aside, Wei Wuxian felt that was the last time they would meet again. He threw away his own life in that path. Just for saving them, he renounced to his place in the Jiang sect, he got the name of the Yiling Patriarch, who was the strongest enemy. Under everyone's eyes, now he was the target to destroy.

*****

After a year living where no one would dare to even get close to, protecting those people from the claws of inhumane beings, Wei Wuxian continued his life, missing the wedding of his sister, the rebuild of the Lotus Pier, missing so many things he would have lived if he hadn't saved them. Yet he didn’t regret it. Because he had revived Wen Ning and was making that small town they had built together be a nice place to stay. However, he was starting to wonder for how long they would be able to keep like this after he met again with Lan Wangji. At that moment, he realized his own loneliness. How he missed his family, his siblings, his friends, his sect, even Lan Wangji. He missed the past. But that would never come back. Then, what was left in his life then?

*****

The surprising news of his sister giving birth to his nephew and inviting Wei Wuxian to the ceremony for his first month shocked everyone. He was willing to assist and start to get closer again to see if things could work in that way. However, a trap in the way to the celebration for killing him finally made him lose control while fighting with Wen Ning. Jin Zixuan, the husband of Jiang Yanli, got murdered in front of his eyes. Since then, everything fell as a castle of cards. The remaining Wen clan decided to face the Jin sect and pay for that death with their own lives. That was when Wei Wuxian understood that he had nothing else to fight for. He couldn’t go back anywhere because he had no place to go anymore. Everyone wanted him dead. But the thing was that he was already dead in life.

That was why he went to the celebration for having killed the Wen people left. Everyone he had known was there. His own brother Jiang Cheng, his last friend's family Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren, the big brother of his other childhood friend, Nie Mingjue, and Jin Guangyao, the future leader as Jin Zixuan died after Jin Guangshan, his father. Everyone was celebrating a victory. But for Wei Wuxian, he had lost his family for second time. All that people had become a second home for him. He had given everything he had to take care of everyone, yet he failed. And now, all of them deserved to pay for the lives they had taken away unfairly.

That night was probably the most violent, cruelest and bloodiest fight the history in the four sects had even seen. The ground was covered by dead people who stood up controlled by the power of Wei Wuxian while playing Chen Qing with one of the most savage melodies he had ever used. He didn’t care who was there anymore. He didn’t care, his mind just needed to repay all the people who had been killed and who were important for him. Until his sister appeared in the war and he heard her voice again. No matter if Lan Wangji had showed up to try to stop him, only her voice made him react. But it was too late because he couldn’t control his puppets anymore. They didn’t follow his orders, he couldn’t protect her and in front of his eyes, he saw how one of his puppets hurt her back deeply.

At that moment, he understood that everyone who would stand beside him would be hurt. Yet he had missed her so much, he had wanted to apologize so much for the death of his husband, that he approached her, no matter if Jiang Cheng was holding her. Her soft hand caressing his cheek was all he needed in that sea of hate, sorrow and desperation. That was why, when someone approached to kill him behind his back, he didn’t notice it and his sister pushed him away, receiving the sword into her heart, dying in that second without being able to talk with his little brother again. Right after he saw the dead body of his sister, his world collapsed. Now he had nothing. Now he was really alone in that world. And now, it was when everyone deserved to die.

That was why he grabbed his flute and played as strong as he could to make more blood fall on the ground, the same one where his sister had lost her life. However, he was too weak already and couldn't play anymore, being vulnerable in the middle of the battle field. Hence, everyone focused on him, on killing him and getting finally the Yin Hu Fu. Then, Wei Wuxian understood that was all they wanted. Power. They were blind by the power that artifact could give to its owner. So if that was what they wanted, Wei Wuxian would give them. He didn’t need it anymore. That was why he laughed, watching how pitiful and shameful they all were, fighting for the artifact and forgetting that the main target was ending his life. Still he cried, understanding he had seen his family dying just because human was too ambitious, narcissistic and selfish like to be able to do that just to get the power.

Then, they could take it. Power had just ruined his life and the lives of those around him in the end. Power wasn't that wonderful thing they thought it was. It was a curse. A curse that destroyed everything on its way.

Hence, he approached the cliff beside the battle field to end with that curse, to end his life and be unable to hurt anyone else. To protect those who loved him, even if he doubted there was someone who did yet. By his surprise, only one person appeared beside him. Lan Wangji was standing there, telling him to come back, but Wei Wuxian thought that wasn't worth it and closed his eyes before feeling the nowhere on his back, falling from the cliff to end his life by himself. However, abruptly a hand grabbed his. Blood covering both that went out from a deep wound Lan Wangji had on his arm, still he refused to let him go. At that moment, for a second, he rethought if he could live for that man in front of him.

But life wasn't that easy when Jiang Cheng appeared beside Lan Wangji, his face filled with sorrow after having lost his sister. Wei Wuxian looked at him with the most serene gaze he had had in the whole night to hear how the man who was keeping him alive begged for his help, yet his younger brother only sent him to hell before crashing his sword into the rock and turning it around, making it break easier. At that moment, Wei Wuxian understood he wanted them both to fall, to die in that cliff and in a second, his arm broke the grip, that hand was hardly maintaining anymore, in a fast move. Then, hearing his name being shouted for last time by the only person he could have saved for real in his life, he died in the end of that cliff, finally finishing that curse that had been accompanying him since he discovered one of the most powerful artifact.

*****

“L-Lan...” suddenly, a mutter was heard beside him. The game in his hand was paused and he took a glance to that man who had been in comma for three weeks already. His fingers were trying to move clumsily as his face had a deep frown and his mouth was muttering something he couldn’t understand. “L-Lan Zhan...” then, the man in the other bed decided to call for a nurse through the button at his side. In less than ten seconds, a woman in white clothes appeared in the room.

“I think he's trying to wake up” he explained to her and the nurse went out for two seconds before coming back to examinate him.

“Lan Zhan... Jiang Cheng...” he constantly muttered, trying to move unsuccessfully because his muscles were completely helpless after a long while in bed. Then, a doctor came in too and went to check his pulsations, his blood pressure, his pupils. Meanwhile, the other patient just watched the scene, wanting to know if he was going to finally wake up. He had been in that bed for just one week, but after all it was pretty boring.

“Xiao Zhan, do you hear me?” the doctor asked him.

“Lan Zhan...” that man was only able to repeat the same name over and over again. Finally, his eyes opened disoriented and confused.

“Xiao Zhan, you're in the hospital, don't be scared” the nurse also tried to help, calming him down. However, Xiao Zhan started to look around with his eyes.

“No... Xiao no... Lan... It's Lan Zhan...” he breathed heavily, needing to find the person he was mentioning constantly.

“Do you know your name?” the doctor asked him to check if he was having brain damage.

“Wei Wuxian...” at that moment, the doctor frowned deeply.

“Ask for a brain scan, quickly” the nurse ran off from the bedroom as the doctor continued trying to know more about his condition.

“How old are you?”

“Twenty... One?” he spoke, but due to the doctor's expression, the other patient knew that wasn't correct.

“In which country are we?”

“Take me to GusuLan... I need to see Lan Zhan...” his answers were as if indeed he was another person. Right after, the doctor went out too. In that brief of time alone, Xiao Zhan looked around, turning his neck a bit until finding the suspicious gaze of the other man. Suddenly, as if he had seen an angel, a radiant smile appeared on his face and started to blink fast. “Lan Zhan...!” he spoke sounding so happy, the patient widened his eyes.

“Me?” his finger pointed to his face, astonished.

“Lan Zhan... You're here... I have... So many things to tell you...” Xiao Zhan talked as he could, coughing sometimes. But what surprised him especially was watching how a tear fell through his temple, disappearing into the pillow.

“I’m sorry, I'm Wang Yibo... I...” he didn’t know what else to say when those desperate eyes begged him.

“Lan Zhan... Let me explain you...” he sounded extremely anguished for whatever reason he had in his mind. However, Yibo wasn't able to calm him and make him understand he was wrong.

“I’m not that Lan Zhan...”

“What are you saying...? Stop joking...” at that moment, two nurses came in to take the bed with Xiao Zhan to the scan room. “Lan Zhan... Don't go...” those eyes that man dedicated to him before leaving were engraved into his pupils. What was wrong with that man?

Then, the doctor appeared too to grab some papers and Yibo took advantage. “Doctor, he doesn’t stop calling me Lan Zhan, what happens?”

“After a comma, we must verify his brain is fine. It's usual to find confusion or short memory loss. Until we find out what's happening to him, just follow his game so he will stay calm” the doctor adviced him. “And how's your leg, by the way?” he crossed his arms.

“It hurts a lot since the surgery...” Yibo answered briefly, not even wanting to think about his condition.

“Just wait a bit more. Continue taking the painkillers. I'll come in a while” then, the room was left alone and Yibo looked at his own leg, completely covered by a plaster until his hips after breaking his knee due to a motorbike accident. His hand grabbed tightly the sheets and covered it with them, not even wishing to glance at it. His red eyes were dried quickly to restart his game on his phone.

*****

After one hour, a bed came back to the bedroom, the man in it looked calmer and looked around like a kid who needed to observe everything. This time, Yibo didn’t stop the game and just glanced at him swiftly. The nurses left the room as soon as they settled him and no one spoke a word. It wasn't too different from before after all. Or that was what Yibo thought at first.

“Lan Zhan, you're as silent as always... Let me tell you, you look more handsome with long hair, why did you cut it?” suddenly, that person started to ramble nonsense about him and Yibo frowned, but didn’t dedicate a second gaze. “I know that we never really got along... But Lan Zhan, I must confess that the last year, I was so happy when we met...” he continued talking and talking, describing moments as if he for sure had lived them. However, Yibo couldn't understand anything and got really annoyed. “After, A-Yuan just kept talking about the rich big brother...”

“Can you shut up?” his voice was rude and a bit louder than what he wanted. Indeed, that person shut up with shocked expression so for an instant, Yibo felt bad, remembering the words of the doctor. However, that feeling disappeared quickly.

“Aiyo, Lan Zhan. You haven't changed... Like that, you won't ever find a good woman” Xiao Zhan commented carelessly and Yibo had enough. He left the phone on the table strongly, scaring him deeply and approached his wheelchair. Then, he sat over it, being careful of not hitting his leg anywhere. But before going away, that man seemed as having recovered miraculously.

“What happened to your leg, Lan Zhan? Don't tell me it's still injured since Xuanwu cave? I told you to use more medicine, but you chose to use it on me...” his mouth was like an endless well, not stopping talking even to breathe.

“Why don't you mind your own fucking business?” Yibo looked at him with hateful eyes and started to move the wheelchair towards the exit.

“Wow, Lan Zhan, since when do you talk that rudely? Isn't that a rule in your sect?” he spoke unashamedly, provoking that man constantly. However, Yibo wasn't that Lan Zhan and didn’t have any rule to follow. So he just went off, not even answering again or security guards would need to come and avoid a murder.

His blood was boiling, being absolutely mad with that person. One thing was that he had just come back from the comma and had memory loss, but Yibo was just another patient that shouldn’t have to bear with such stupid comments. Especially about his leg.

He just wandered around the hospital, not wanting to return to the bedroom at all. However, a nurse found him not resting as always and forced him to go back. “Yibo, breathe a bit more. He's not himself right now, just give him time. The more annoyed you are, the more he will talk, I'm sure of that” the nurse tried to adviced him as they walked together along the hallway.

“He’s really stupid, talking nonsense constantly... I don't want to hear him even a single second more...” his complains were filled of rage, but not exactly provoked by Xiao Zhan.

“Weren't you bored when he was asleep? Now bear with him” the nurse laughed even if Yibo didn’t find it funny.

Once back, Xiao Zhan was looking through the window, his face totally serious and even nostalgic. He didn’t say a word while the nurse helped Yibo to lie down on the bed. Finally, silence filled that bedroom and the man decided to take a nap now he was calm. However, naïve of him to think that would last.

“Lan Zhan... Where are we?” suddenly, he asked, his voice sounding extremely anguished for a second. That called Yibo's attention and breathed before answering as the nurse told him.

“We’re on a hospital, you're recovering” for once, his answer was normal.

“What’s that?” then, Xiao Zhan showed his ignorance regarding the word hospital and turned his head to look at him. It was all the movement he could do.

“A hospital is a place where doctors heal ill people” for first time, he looked at his almond eyes while maintaining a decent chat.

“Why can't I move? Is that why I'm here?” Xiao Zhan was really confused. His knowledge was more alike to a person of thousands of years ago instead of a nowadays person.

“You can't move because you've spent a few weeks in comma” Yibo explained, not really wanting to go further just in case he wouldn't understand his words.

“I thought I had died when I fell from the cliff... But I've just been sleeping after all. Where's Chen Qing? What happened with the Yin Hu Fu?” he started to say again those random things, asking questions that looked proper of a movie and Yibo really wondered how all of that was created inside his mind.

“Look, I don't know what you're talking about. I just want to rest, so please, stay in silence” that was his best attempt to request a bit of calmness in that room. Luckily, that man followed his words and remained in silence, letting him take a brief nap. However, he dreamed about a guy, a tall guy with a flute in his hand, dressed with black robes and he had long hair tied in a ponytail. He was smiling at him as bright as the sun. For a second, that image brought him so much warmth and love into his chest. But suddenly, that person started to disappear and darkness swallowed him until he woke up pretty suffocated due to that dream. He coughed a few times, searching for a bottle of water he had near.

Yibo drank plenty of it, needing to refresh himself. He was sure having that mad guy had affected him too much to even dream about such a thing. Then, he glanced at the side where the other bed was and found a man who was still looking at the nowhere through the window. His eyes were extremely sad and for a second Yibo saw himself reflected on them.

After a while, one of the hands of that man tried to move, but only his fingers could be stretched as a fail attempt to achieve whatever he desired. “Lan Zhan... Could you give me some water?” he asked, being unable to do it by himself. Yibo doubted if he should call a nurse. However, he sat on his wheelchair and surrounded his bed. Then, because his leg was stretched completely, reaching his head was complicated. Still, he could raise him a bit before placing the bottle on his lips and Xiao Zhan drank like he hadn't drunk for ages. Meanwhile, Yibo could feel that soft hair of his against his fingertips and for a second, his memories shook as if a thunder had crossed his brain. However, he came back to Earth when that man stopped drinking so his head was returned back to the pillow and the bottle was closed.

Yibo was going to go when a hand was stretched before his eyes, trembling because of the lack of strength. Then, immediately he thought no one had came to see him in the week he had spent in the hospital, no one had held that hand waiting for his awakening. That was why instinctively he grabbed it, surrounding it gently, as if he was scared it would break. Right after, Yibo looked at those eyes that were smiling at him. “Thank you, Lan Zhan... And I'm sorry..” Xiao Zhan spoke that with tears in his eyes. Suddenly, his stomach jumped in him, feeling how those deep emotions filled his heart too unexplainably. If that was product of a brain malfunction, how was he able to feel it that much? Yibo was unable to tell he wasn't himself at all.

“Rest, you'll recover soon” the patient chose to say, giving him some hope about moving back, the hope he hadn't got anymore. His thumb rubbed that hand, stroking it softly before leaving it over the mattress again and returning to his bed.

For once, that man looked as behaving and had fallen asleep. Only then, Yibo grabbed his phone and tried to play for a while. However, he couldn’t focus, wondering constantly why he had dreamt with that man, why Xiao Zhan felt so familiar, why his emotions had been so uncontrollable since he woke up. It had just been some hours, but it felt longer, as if years had gone by. That was why tiredness was so hard, so much that when he realized, a nurse was calling him to wake up because she had brought the dinner. He sat while yawning on the bed, having a tray with food in front of him.

“No food for me?” Xiao Zhan asked, being awake too and looking at them.

“No, you can't yet. Your body is not used to food anymore. Once we confirm you're stable, we will start to give some soap or puree until you can eat solid food again” the nurse explained nicely to him, who looked pretty confused and angry because of that.

“My stomach is done by iron, a bit of rice at least won't hurt me” Xiao Zhan complained with a pouting face while Yibo was eating mercilessly.

“You need to wait” the nurse checked the dropper that fed him through his vein.

“I'm starving! I'm gonna die!” he cried out, closing his eyes like wanting to have a tantrum, but under the sheets, only slight trembling limbs highlighted.

“Don't worry, you won't” she laughed and went away.

Now they were alone, Yibo began to be sure silence wouldn't last. And as he had predicted, that man had too much energy to talk. “Lan Zhan... Pst, Lan Zhan, gimme some, please” he asked in a mutter, but Yibo just glanced at him with a raised eyebrow.

“She said you can't” he refused without a doubt and continued eating without a word, not mattering how bothering that man could be.

“Lan Zhan... Let me tell you, rules exist to break them. Also, I'm sure this isn't the Cloud Recesses. Even if you break some rules by feeding me, nobody will know! I won't tell your bother or uncle. Just a bit...” rambles were done, Yibo not understanding even just a single bit of anything. That was why he kept in silence, doing as if he didn’t exist.

When he got tired to talk with the wall, Xiao Zhan shut up and looked through the window again. In the meantime, Yibo finished his dinner and called the nurse to take it back. After, he played some games, enjoying the peace after one of the most tiring days in his whole stance on the hospital. Then, he left the phone on the table, lying down to rest, when he found that cute face of that man as he slept. Yibo stared at him for a few seconds, having mixed feeling regarding him, but just deciding in the end to close his eyes and rest.

However, in the middle of the night, Xiao Zhan was waken up by loud complains Yibo was doing. His hands were grabbing the sheets tightly as his lips were whining painfully. His hair was even wet from the sweat. At first, Xiao Zhan tried to call him a few times, but just loud complains were done. Then, he thought he must search for help, yet he didn’t know how. His voice was still very low and cracky. He looked around and found a button over his head as the one Yibo had too and when he pressed it, a nurse appeared. So he tried to press it, still he couldn’t move as he wanted. Meanwhile, his eyes were just watching how he was in an unbearable pain and Xiao Zhan was aware he must help him at any cost. That was why he gathered all his strength into moving that arm. Shaking as if it was going to break, it started to move, but that caused him a lot of pain too that made him sweat deeply. Luckily, with a lot of effort and pain, his fingers reached that button and pressed it.

Seconds after, a nurse showed up, being shocked by finding Yibo suffering on that bed. “Oh my, you even have a temperature by the pain...” she muttered, looking at the thermometer. Then, she went out and brought a doctor as soon as possible.

“Yibo, can you hear me?” he asked as his hands kept him still by his shoulders. Then, the patient opened his eyes and nodded. “We will put some strong painkillers and a fever suppressant, okay?” the doctor informed as the nurse started to add liquids in the dropper contected to his arm. Yibo only nodded vaguely, handling the pain until the medicines would be effective.

Now that the situation looked controlled, the doctor went away and the nurse stayed in the room until she started to check the pain and fever were decreasing properly. Yibo started to look calmer finally and Xiao Zhan sighed, remembering his arm was still holding the button. However, when he tried to return it, a hard pain filled half of his body and his mouth couldn’t help but complain. It was audible for the nurse, who turned around and observed him.

“What happens? “ she asked, indeed, noticing that arm shouldn’t be like that.

“I had to press the button, but now it's hurting a lot” Xiao Zhan explained, kind of grinning troublesomely. The nurse approached then, and grabbed it to slowly make it come back while the patient handled the pain his muscles created. Once it was under the sheet again, Xiao Zhan showed a lovely smile.

“Thank you, you're not only beautiful outside, but also inside” he praised the nurse, who widened a bit her eyes and giggled nervously.

“Don't even dare... To flirt with nurses on my face...” suddenly, a voice came from the other side. Yibo was barely awake due to the strong medicines, yet he could hear that and complain.

“Are you jealous, Lan Zhan? I can praise you too. You're definitely the most handsome cultivator in GusuLan” Xiao Zhan continued his nonsense of names and Yibo sighed. Meanwhile, the nurse in the middle was startled by these two and decided to go when she assured Yibo was stable finally.

After that, both remained in silence, one because he was drugged and the other because he was satisfied of watching him until falling asleep.

*****

At the next day, the usual doctor who treated them came back, wanting to check why Yibo had been in so much pain the last night. He told him a scan of his leg would be necessary to see if the first surgery was progressing or not. At that moment, the face of that man collapsed and as he was waiting to be carried away, his arm was covering his eyes, not wanting to know anything else about the world. Meanwhile, Xiao Zhan was talking with another doctor, a physical therapist, about the rehab they would start doing so Xiao Zhan would be able to move as soon as possible. So they were checking how stiff his limbs were. Yibo heard some complains and whines, still he didn’t even take a look.

What's more, when the nurses came to take him, Xiao Zhan wished him good luck and Yibo only turned his head to the opposite side, hating luck. It had never been with him after all and he didn’t have hope either. He lost it the day he had the crash. However, being inside that machine, checking the leg again, having to wait for bad news after, was like reviving that day, his worst nightmore. So when he returned to the bedroom, Xiao Zhan was there, welcoming him with a smile. “How was it? You're fine, right? Lan Zhan is so strong, don't worry” his sweet words weren't so for Yibo, who just wanted to slap that easy mouth of his. Still, he couldn’t because the doctor came sooner than expected and that just meant one thing. It was bad.

“Yibo, we checked your leg and it's not healing as we want” when he heard that, the whole world ended for that man on that bed. “Your knee was severely injured that day and even if the surgery was a success, not always it heals in the right way. It seems you will need a second surgery so we can remove the part it's not healing and put a prosthesis” even the doctor seemed as very sad for what he was saying and even if Xiao Zhan didn’t fully understand the meaning of that, he could understand Yibo's expression. “You know what this means. If your knee had healed, you would have had a lot of trouble to come back, but now you need a prosthesis, dance and motorbike are done for you” when the doctor said that, Yibo only nodded, just looking at other side, his chin trembling slightly. ”Yibo, I'm sorry. We can't do anything else to-“

“Just do your job” the patient suddenly cut his nice words. He didn’t need that. He just wanted to be alone. So the doctor understood.

“The surgery will be tomorrow, we need to replace it before it continues accepting the current knee” he informed and went away, leaving a dark Yibo on the bed. He just looked at the ceiling, thinking all he had lost, he had nothing else. Then, when he sighed, tears couldn’t make it and fell through his temples. It could be visible for Xiao Zhan, who immediately widened his eyes.

“Lan Zhan, please, don't cry. They will heal you, you'll be fine” he tried to encourage him.

“Shut up...” Yibo muttered while covering his eyes.

“Look at me, I'm trying to recover, you can do the same. We can do it together!”

“Shut up...”

“We can support each other and improve. I'm gonna be with you, don't be scared, Lan Zh-“

“WHY CAN'T YOU SHUT UP?!” suddenly, Yibo sat on the bed, his face deformed by pain and hatred. “WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ME? YOU'VE JUST LOST YOUR MIND AND CAN'T EVEN DISTINGUISH PEOPLE AROUND YOU. SO SHUT THE FUCK UP ONCE AND FOR ALL. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOU ANYMORE. I WISH YOU WERE STILL IN COMMA AND NEVER WAKE UP AGAIN!” he yelled at Xiao Zhan, who was completely terrified by not only his words, but also his expression. Right after, Yibo started to punch the bed with his fists, still shouting with all his lungs had. “I DON'T WANT THIS. I DON'T WANT THIS. JUST REMOVE THIS FROM ME!” immediately, his hands started to try to open the plaster around his leg.

“No! Lan Zhan! Don't do that!”

“STOP CALLING ME THAT! JUST DIE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!” he shouted so loud even nurses around ran to see what was happening. Once they found him trying to rip it out, they grabbed his arms and pressed him against the mattress. However, Yibo was so out of himself that his strength increased exponentially.

“RELEASE ME! REMOVE THIS SHIT FROM MY LEG, I WANNA GO!”

“Call security!” one of the nurses shouted outside and in seconds, two men came in the room, one was the doctor and other was a security guy, who helped the nurses to keep him still as they injected a tranquilizer.

“NO! LEAVE ME ALONE... Just let me go...” as he saw he couldn't move anymore, Yibo just gave up and started sobbing really hard. “Why must it happen to me..? Why me...?” he repeated that over and over again as the tranquilizer did effect in his body. Then, the security guy released him, but stayed in a corner just in case. The doctor approached him to examine if he had hurt his leg and indeed, he had scratched the skin around it. A nurse sat on the bed with medical supplies to heal it.

At this point, Yibo was half unconscious, muttering senseless stuff. So the security guy and the other nurse left the room. However, the doctor stayed, thinking that such an unstable patient as Yibo couldn’t be in the same place as a patient like Xiao Zhan who needed peace. So he evaluated the horrified expression that man had, his eyes never leaving his roommate. “Hey, are you okay?” the doctor asked and Xiao Zhan took a few seconds to react.

“I’m... Fine. Yes...” his words weren't too smooth, though.

“Do you want us to change you of room?” right after, this question was done, the patient shook his head harshly.

“No, let me be with him, please” he requested with worried expression. “I can't let him alone” at these words, the doctor and nurse were shocked, but they understood his decision and he left, followed by the nurse moments after too.

Now they were alone again, Xiao Zhan stretched his hand, wanting to reach and hug him. However, he wasn't able to do that. Then, he promised one thing. “I’ll give my best to recover, so I'll be there for you”

*****

At the next day, Yibo was still drugged, conscious, but drugged so he was just breathing. He didn’t want to eat or even drink. The nurses had to feed him through the dropper or he wouldn't be strong enough to handle the surgery. In the meantime, Xiao Zhan didn’t talk to him again. Not because he was angry due to his words, but because he understood Yibo needed time to overcome his internal fight. Still, he kept beside, just in case he needed help anytime. During that waiting, he only met the physical therapist, who had developed a personal training for him. It hurt like hell, but every time he wanted to stop, Xiao Zhan only looked at his side and remembered he would only be able to help him if he could move again.

Even when he was alone, the doctor had given him a soft ball so he would start training his hands. He didn’t stop. With one hand, with the other. Even he moved his feet from side to side, up and down. It was tough as long as he had just started, but when Yibo came back from the surgery, many hours after and saw how his leg was, filled with bandages and a plaster again, Xiao Zhan's heart jumped out of his chest. He could feel what had happened to Yibo was worse than what was happening to him.

*****

Since the surgery, Yibo didn’t speak again. The nurses tried to give him conversation, but he didn’t answer back. Even when the doctor came to say everything was going better this time, his face didn’t express anything. In the other hand, Xiao Zhan didn't talk with him either. He chatted with the staff, with his physical therapist, but they didn’t exchange a single word more since that day.

Weeks went by like this.

Xiao Zhan progressed favorably, already moving the hands, the feet, the arms clumsily and he was able to keep sitting with the help of someone. Also, he had started to eat soft solid food so the energy increased. However, his brain wasn't back. He continued believing he was Wei Wuxian and the patient beside him was Lan Zhan. And doctors continued waiting to see if it was permanent or not.

In the other hand, Yibo stopped eating, so he lost so much weight. He didn’t move or talk. He did nothing but exist. Even a psychologist came to see if she could help him, but he didn’t open his mouth at all.

Then, a whole month happened and the day to open the plaster arrived. Xiao Zhan was sitting on his bed, checking better what was happening. Now he was wearing glasses because after all, he had bad sight and only found out when he started to complain why everything was blurred. However, now he was able to see all perfectly and when that was open, Xiao Zhan widened his eyes. The whole leg was thin as a stick, white, blue and purple. But around the knee, it was seriously purple with two long lines filled with black stitches. For a second, Xiao Zhan wanted to stop looking, still he chose to see Yibo's expression.

He was also sitting on the bed, watching his injured leg with red eyes, but his expression was nowhere to be found. Then, the doctor started to touch different parts of it, asking if he could feel his finger and if it was painful. Yibo nodded with the first question and shook his head with the second. Slowly, a nurse started to remove the dry stitches and checked the wound had healed properly. Yibo's face didn’t change, just stopped looking.

“Okay, everything seems fine, but now we must verify you can move your foot and knee, even if it's just a bit” the doctor grabbed his foot to move it up and down slowly, but Yibo begged him to stop, agonizing in pain. “I know it's horrible, breathe in and out, okay?” however, when he was going to try it for second time, Xiao Zhan talked.

“Wait! Help me to sit on there” he pointed out the wheelchair and the physical therapist, who was there doing his morning schedule, helped him to sit on it. Then, Xiao Zhan moved around with trembling arms so he could face Yibo, being right beside him. That man widened his eyes, staring into his roommate's for first time in weeks, and suddenly, his hand was grabbed softly. “You grabbed mine back then. It's my turn to grab yours now” Yibo immediately thought of when he helped him to drink water the first day. However, he would never know Xiao Zhan wasn't remembering that, but a memory created in his brain.

Then, the doctor tried to move his foot again and even if Yibo closed his eyes tightly, his hand had the support he needed so the doctor could see his foot was able to move. Now it was turn to the knee and Xiao Zhan could see how Yibo was panicking. “Look at me” an order was done. “Look at me, don't look at your leg” Xiao Zhan insisted and the man did it, finding two almond eyes, full of energy and hope. Exactly, what he lacked so badly.

Hastily, the doctor raised his knee slightly and even if it moved, Yibo would have wished it hadn’t. He had never felt pain alike. His hand was stroking Xiao Zhan's so hard that the latter had to grab it with both at the same time. Luckily, it just lasted five seconds and his breath came back to his lungs. At that moment, Yibo lay on the pillow, which was elevated along with part of the bed so he wasn't completely lain down.

“You did it” two hands shook his slightly and when the young man looked at his side, Xiao Zhan was smiling at him so brightly that for a second, Yibo showed a fleeting grin.

“Great news, the prosthesis is working. The nurse will put bandages around your leg because it's too weak to leave it free, but be assured you'll be able to start rehab very soon” the doctor showed a satisfied smile and surprising everyone in that room, Yibo raised his hand.

“Thank you, doctor” he maintained it up, waiting for his answer. Then, the doctor nodded and shook it.

“You're welcome” after, he left and the nurses started to bandage his leg again.

“Wei Ying” that was how everyone should call him instead of Xiao Zhan or he really got mad. “We have to continue the rehab too” the physical therapist said, but he patient looked reticent to come back.

“Can we continue after? I want to stay here for a while more” he asked and the doctor laughed and nodded. After, he glanced at Yibo and got out of the room. The nurses also giggled and ended their work pretty fast. Once alone, Yibo noticed they were still holding hands and tried to break that contact, understanding why everyone was laughing.

“I...”

“Lan Zhan, now you have to eat” abruptly, Xiao Zhan ordered him. “I know what it is to lose something important, but we must continue fighting” his voice was soft, with a pinch of bitterness in his words. Yibo was perfectly aware what he was saying wasn't real, but for a second, he doubted.

“What did you lose?” that doubt provoked he would ask that.

“I lost Lotus Pier... My family... My sister... Even... My golden core...” he confessed. Yibo was once again not understanding anything. However, when he heard golden core, his soul trembled, as if he knew what was that. “That’s why I used the Yin Hu Fu instead of Suibian... I know what is to be unable to do what you've been born to, but there are other ways. I can help you” Xiao Zhan spoke as if all of that was the reality. Along with that uneasiness that appeared inside of him since he heard that, Yibo frowned deeply. Why was all of that feeling so familiar?

“Suibian was an important sword to you, right?” he asked, wanting to know more. However, when he realized his words, how had he known it was a sword? How was he able to know what Suibian meant?

“It was a gift from uncle Jiang... I always dreamt of being the best swordman so I'd always follow Jiang Cheng... But...” then, Yibo saw how that man lowered his head and dried his cheek quickly. Immediately he sat and touched his shoulder, so in exchange, that man looked up with soft eyes. “Everything's the past already, though...” then, Xiao Zhan tried to move his wheelchair, but his arms were still so weak and he got tired pretty easily.

“Wait” his hand on his shoulder didn’t let him go. “I want to apologize” Yibo said, looking aside when Xiao Zhan turned around shocked. “The day I shouted... I said horrible things... I'm very sorry for that...” slowly, that grip disappeared because he became really embarrassed. However, that man smiled warmly and raised his fingers to caress his cheek softly.

“Don’t worry, I've also said horrible things to you back then... We can start again” he removed his hand and now he was really coming back to his bed because his physical therapist had arrived. At that moment, Yibo lay down, watching how he trained with a smile even if it was clear he was in pain, giving his best to recover the strength in his arms.

At the end of the session, the doctor approached Yibo and sat beside him. “I know what happened to you and what possibilities you have of returning to your old life. However, I'm willing to help you to at least try to walk again” that man spoke comprehensively. “Do you accept my help?” that question was done and Yibo looked away for a second.

A month ago he almost died in a motorbike accident. He crashed against a car and his leg was stuck between the car and motorbike. It was already a miracle he didn’t lose it, still he lost the hope to continue dancing or competing in races. And without that, without two of his passions, he also lost every guide in his life, leaving him empty. That last month had been a tough process inside of him to assimilate his old life would never come back. He would never be the same guy anymore. Still, having Xiao Zhan working so hard beside him everyday made him realize that he only had a leg to recover, not the whole body that he had even seen how others had to clean his butt. All of that made him think if he had been so unluckily as he thought at first. And maybe, all he had to be thankful for was to have survived the accident.

“I want the rehab, I want my leg back” he decided aloud, accepting the training. The doctor smiled and tapped his shoulder.

“Now you can't retreat” he joked and said goodbye. Immediately, Xiao Zhan shouted happily.

“Lan Zhan! I knew you wouldn't give up! Lan Wangji is invincible!” his face was full of pride as he crossed his arms. Yibo had to look away to hide a soft smile that wanted to appear in his face. Suddenly, it was like hope had reminded him he could be happy too. What was more important yet, that he deserved to be happy.

*****

After a few days talking and accompanying each other better, Yibo started to eat all the meals, to be more positive, to talk and to accept he had a problem he had to overcome. And all was thanks to Xiao Zhan who supported him daily. He never ran out of words, maybe talking too much. However, Yibo got used to listen to him. Sometimes he even giggled by a joke or too much cheekiness. In general, the situation improved fascinatingly.

That was why some nights they kept talking as that one. Yibo had approached Xiao Zhan's bed to sit beside him and show him some games. Of course, for the amnesic man, that looked like an artefact of dark magic. But once he saw how funny it was, Yibo couldn’t play anymore, just watching how he played and complained when he was killed. “How dare you to kill me! You wouldn’t have guts to fight against me in person!” he shouted, refering to the life his brain had made up and Yibo just laughed, removing the phone from his hands.

“Enough for today” he was already grabbing the crutches, but a hand grabbed his on the bed. At that moment, Yibo froze and his whole body got tense.

“Lan Zhan, stay a while more” he asked with low voice. Then, the young man looked behind him.

“I won't go anywhere, my bed is right there”

“Too far” Xiao Zhan complained, looking down. Yibo doubted a few seconds, but after all, he left the crutches on their place and returned to be on his previous spot.

“Do you want to talk?” he wasn't stupid either and thought something was wrong.

“I want to ask you one thing” Yibo nodded and listened to him. “How is that I'm alive if I fell from a cliff?” he asked. Obviously, he had no idea of what he was talking about so Yibo had to invent a story.

“You didn’t die, but kept asleep for a very long while” he chose not to share too many details or the connection might break. Indeed, Xiao Zhan wasn't convinced, but remained in silence, thinking. “Now you tell me” Yibo requested. “When I arrived here, I lost all my memories, that's why all you talk about sounds weird to me. Tell me who I was” he was clever enough to make him say who Lan Zhan was. Lately, Yibo had been suspicious of the story he had in his brain so he would know more and search for it in Baidu after.

“Why didn’t you tell me first? You're so weird compared to the old Lan Wangji” Xiao Zhan whined, but began to relate a story right after. It took him half an hour without plenty of details. The more Yibo listened, the more he felt his soul shaking in him, as if his words had the power to awake something inside of him. Many images came to his brain, as if picturing each scene was so easy as just remembering memories.

“And I didn’t help you?” suddenly, Yibo asked, right after hearing about the Qiongqi road and Wen clan.

“No... Just let me go...” Xiao Zhan answered with sad voice. When he heard him, Yibo clicked his tongue and embraced his shoulders with an arm.

“I regret it, then” he stroked one of him softly, thinking how that Lan Zhan was so stupid to let him go like that when saving those people was the right thing to do. However, his heart was clenched with regrets out of sudden.

“Lan Zhan...” lowly, Xiao Zhan called him and Yibo turned his head to see what happened. What he couldn’t imagine was that the amnesic man would would grab his chin and kiss him tenderly, tasting those wet lips of Yibo's after having bitten them for a while. At that moment, he widened his eyes because they were kissing so suddenly, but at the next instant, Xiao Zhan retreated with red ears. “I'm sorry... I...” he babbled, wanting to run away from that bed. However, Yibo's brain could only think one thing.

“I was who kissed you back in that tree...” the words came out without even knowing why. In his mind, there was one image stuck about Lan Zhan kissing Wei Ying with his eyes covered. And Xiao Zhan looked as remembering too because right after hearing those words, that man almost fell from the bed.

“That you...?!” they looked at each other with two pairs of eyes that were about to jump out of their faces. Yibo got extremely embarrassed and got the crutches so fast he almost fell when he stood up. Luckily, he got to reach his bed without any type of dangerous situation and lay down to sleep. “Lan Zhan! You stole my first kiss! How dare you!” he shouted, not caring if it was late already and people near the room could listen to them.

Still, Yibo didn’t look behind, just desiring to disappear from Earth. But while he was wishing that, his fingers touched his lips, remembering how sweet they were. It had just lasted five seconds, enough to recall them over and over again, needing a second indeed. And for an instant, a shy smile appeared on his face. Was he falling in love with that man?

*****

The next week after that was weird for both. None of them returned to touch the subject or to be close to each other. They just kept playing some games, but on their respective beds; talking about trivial stuff or commenting how the training was. Yibo started the rehab for his knee and even if he needed painkillers, the mobility of the limb was coming back. He was also training the other leg, because after so much time being in bed, it had lost strength too. In the other hand, Xiao Zhan continued his schedule, being able to move the whole torso perfectly. However, the legs were taking longer and he still needed the wheelchair.

As they trained together because the doctor saw they worked better like that, they kept encouraging one another the whole time. So when Xiao Zhan got to stand up with the help of the physical therapist for first time, Yibo approached and hugged him, being so proud of his improvement.

“I see you guys really get along well now” the doctor highlighted when they separated, but kept closer than needed. Then, Yibo stood up as a spring and walked towards the exit.

“I'm heading first...” and he went away. Xiao Zhan remained looking at the nowhere until he felt the doctor sitting beside.

“Do you like him?” his question was straightforward and the patient wasn't shocked. He only nodded, admitting it without shame, but looking curiously sad. “Then, why such a long face? Doesn’t he feel the same?”

“It’s not that” his answer came faster than expected. “It’s that when I recover my real memories, I'm not sure I'll still like him anymore” suddenly, he confessed and the doctor widened his eyes, not knowing he was aware of that.

“Since when do you know you lost your memory?” he asked immediately.

“When Yibo shouted at me, I started to doubt. But a few days ago... I was alone, bored, so I saw papers at the end of my bed. I read them. My real name is Xiao Zhan, not Wei Ying. My age is 27, not 21. My birth city is Chongqing, not Yunmeng. The reason why I'm here is not because I fell from that cliff, but because I fell from a window in the third floor when I was cleaning the place I work at. What's more, that man is not Lan Zhan, but Wang Yibo, his age is 21 and he's from Luoyang. All I remember doesn't fit with all what surrounds me. It's not hard to understand I can’t remember my real life, but also my brain created a new identity by itself” the man spoke frustrated, feeling the last month and a half as a lie. Everyone around him didn’t tell him the truth. Even Yibo hid it and became Lan Zhan. Now more than never, his brain was totally messed.

“That’s true, you're Xiao Zhan. But we didn’t want to tell you because an overreaction may cause you more brain damage. Also, you were really stubborn, no one could tell you what you were saying was wrong, so we decided it was better to keep you calm like this” the doctor explained to him, maybe regretting the choice they took for him. “I’m sorry” even if he apologized, it was a bit late. So Xiao Zhan shook his head and moved his wheelchair by himself, going to the exit as long as he didn’t want to train more.

By his surprise, Yibo was there with regretful expression. “Have you heard everything?” Xiao Zhan only asked that because he only wanted to know that. Then, that man nooded without saying a word. “Guess I have to call you Yibo from now on...” the man on the wheelchair muttered while continuing his path. However, a voice stopped him.

“It's not been created by your brain” Yibo muttered hastily, shocking Xiao Zhan.

“If you have heard us, you should know that I already know I'm not Wei Ying-“

“You are” he insisted, meeting those confused eyes.

“What do you mean?”

“Follow me to the rooftop” Yibo started to walk towards the elevator.

“Why not in our room?” he complained because they shouldn’t go to the rooftop. Still Yibo didn’t stop.

“Rooftop”

*****

Once being in the rooftop after having to hide a few times, they finally went out, being able to watch the whole city from there. Yibo breathed deeply, but Xiao Zhan widened his eyes. He hadn't gone out even once, just watched through the window towards a park so he didn’t know how this era looked like. “This is where Xiao Zhan lives” Yibo sat on a cube of ventilation stretching his injured leg. Then, a wheelchair stopped beside him.

“This... What’s this?” he muttered, completely shocked.

“A city, full of buildings, fabrics, cars and all humans have invented since your era” Yibo explained.

“What do you mean?”

“I've searched for someone called Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji in internet-“

“Internet?”

“It's like the biggest library” he tried to make him understand and got a nod. “I didn’t find barely anything. Just a small legend from several hundreds of years ago. That legend talked about Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian and all you've told me was there, but you gave me way more details, as if you for real have lived all of that” Yibo stopped a second to think his words. “I've even had dreams lately of stuff you told me. I can remember parts as if they were my memories for sure” he gulped, not really knowing if he was becoming crazy or he was right.

“You’re telling me I did exist, but long ago” he wanted to confirm.

“Yes. Do you know about reincarnation? “ he gazed at the person beside him. “A soul gets to revive in other body, but not remembering anything of their past lives. However, I found out that some people can recall certains events of their other lives when they get into contact with someone or something that meant a lot back then” Yibo talked, sounding more like a mad guy rather than a normal person.

“So you mean that my soul is Wei Ying in Xiao Zhan's body?”

“No, your soul is the same, but in one life you were called Wei Ying and in this life you were called Xiao Zhan. After you suffered your accident, your soul decided to remember one of your past lives”

“And why exactly Wei Ying?”

“Because coincidentally I ended up in the same room as you” Yibo reached that conclusion because only in this way, all made sense. However, Xiao Zhan looked overwhelmed.

“And what did you do?”

“I'm Lan Zhan” he confessed, observing his reaction. “It’s the same as you. My soul was Lan Wangji back then, but now I'm Wang Yibo. You recognized me and by treating me as Lan Zhan and telling me all the stories, I recovered my memories” his voice sounded extremely excited, getting closer to Xiao Zhan while talking.

“So now you're Lan Wangji and Wang Yibo at the same time” with this sentence, Yibo confirmed he got it and nodded. “So... We’ve finally met again...” Xiao Zhan frowned, containing the emotions inside of him.

“I’ve missed you” Yibo confessed, really needing to say what had chased him even after death.

“It’s hard to imagine a Lan Wangji that talks this much and smiles, though” he laughed, breaking the uncomfortable moment after such a sentence and, even if Yibo smiled too, he grabbed his chin and kissed him slowly. Finally. It felt that time had stopped between them.

“What happened after I died?” suddenly, he broke the kiss to ask, not realizing Yibo wanted to recover the wasted time. However, that question made him remember too many years of sorrows and his face was hidden on his shoulder.

“It’s better if you don't know anything... I can keep those memories only in me...” he refused to tell. Xiao Zhan felt that nothing went well after and decided it was better not to continue asking. They hugged for a while, feeling how they were reunited again.

Then, when they broke the embrace and Xiao Zhan pecked those lips again naughtily, Yibo sighed. “You only need to recover Xiao Zhan's memories”

“How do I do that?”

“I don't know... Let's recover first, we'll find it together” when Yibo smiled tenderly to him, Xiao Zhan couldn’t help but attack those lips again.

Without trying to, they ended up giving to each other all the kisses, caresses and hugs they couldn’t in their past life.

*****

“Now tell me one thing” Xiao Zhan asked him as they came back together through the hallway with swollen lips and some weird marks on their necks. “If you're also Lan Zhan, why don't you behave like him?”

“Because my soul got used to behave as Wang Yibo. I have his memories so I can recall how he felt and acted back then. However, this life belongs to Wang Yibo so my behaviour is his” Yibo explained slowly, walking carefully with the crutches.

“Then, as this life belongs to Xiao Zhan, am I acting like him?” his roommate asked, being really fast in understanding the concepts.

“Exactly. Unconsciously, you behave like him, but sometimes you look as Wei Ying because as you only remember that life, you only have him as reference. This is why recovering Xiao Zhan's memories is so important” his explanations made so much sense that he felt even proud of him.

“How did you discover all of this?”

“Internet and many nights thinking about you” suddenly, he said lowly while entering their bedroom and Xiao Zhan giggled behind him.

“I may get used to this life's behaviour of yours, Yibo” then, it was the first time he called his name and when the young man sat on the bed, he kept staring at him, moving from the wheelchair to the mattress by himself.

“Need help?” he asked when he saw how much he struggled yet with his legs, but Xiao Zhan shook his head.

“No...” once he was over the bed, facing Yibo, he returned to the subject. “I have a doubt, though” he gulped. “We know Lan Zhan and Wei Ying were in love back then, but not because of that, Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan are going to fall in love too” his conclusion made sense, but for one of them, it wasn't valid anymore.

“I think that's late for me” Yibo confessed with a shy smile as Xiao Zhan widened his eyes. “And not because of Lan Wangji's feelings, but because you brought me back to life when I thought it had ended” his words were the most sincere ones he had said to him in those last two months. “Even if you recover his memories and don't love me back, I'll wait for the next life to find you and try it again” he promised with serious face, really meaning each word he was saying while looking into those red eyes that were blinking fast.

“Come here right now” Xiao Zhan requested in a hurry and Yibo didn’t doubt in changing beds to be beside him and receive those two lips he was starting to know very well. A hand surrounded his cheek tenderly as one of his arms embraced his thin waist tightly. For a second, they forgot in which life they were. Hence, they didn’t hear the door being opened. They only came back when heard someone coughing in front of them.

“It seems you two are getting along too well” the doctor laughed while observing two red faces separating. None of them said anything, though, so he continued. “I came to tell you that tomorrow we will do a scan of your brain” the doctor informed to Xiao Zhan, who frowned deeply.

“Why?” he asked, looking scared.

“We want to make sure your amnesia is not provoked by something we can fix. It's better if we keep checking, some injures appear after time” the doctor explained with tender voice to calm him. However, Xiao Zhan felt something was wrong.

“Don’t worry, I'm gonna be with you” Yibo embraced his shoulders to comfort him.

“I know... Thank you, doctor” he muttered, not really having good aspect. He got really worried all of suddenly, pretty anxious and with a bad gut feeling.

During the whole day, Xiao Zhan kept like that, not talking or showing other expression but a concern face. Hence, during the night, after having dinner, Yibo decided to sit on his bed and get into, being careful his leg didn’t hit anything. “What are you doing?” Xiao Zhan asked while frowning. Yibo only kissed his cheek and smiled.

“Cheering you up” he said while kissing his jaw softly. A hand stopped him, though.

“I’m not in the mood...” the older man clarified before turning around and showing him his back. Then, Yibo just lay down behind him and hugged his waist. “Yibo...” he spoke disturbed while turning around so he could scold him properly. However, when those worried eyes met a pair of gentle eyes, he couldn’t say anything else.

“Nothing bad will happen, do you trust me?” he asked, caressing his nose sweetly.

“I do” Xiao Zhan answered without a doubt. That was why Yibo interwined their hands and lay down looking at the ceiling to sleep in his bed. The other man didn’t say anything, just remained beside him, awake and staring at him. Slowly, he cuddled over his shoulder, feeling protected and safe. “I love you, Yibo. Don't forget I do...” then, he closed his eyes and could rest hugging his partner.

*****

At the next morning, the nurse found them sleeping together in the same bed and felt extremely embarrassed when she had to wake them up. The first in opening his eyes was Xiao Zhan, who couldn’t sleep well at all. When he saw the embarrassed nurse, his hand shook Yibo's shoulder, who just growled and hid more his face to continue sleeping. Xiao Zhan sighed and swallowed the shame in him. “What happens?” he asked the nurse, treating that situation as normal when actually it wasn't.

“It’s time for your scan” she spoke lowly, considering his partner was sleeping yet. The patient frowned.

“So early in the morning?” that anxiety came back in seconds.

“Yes, the doctor asked it at first hour in the morning” she explained, looking troubled because she couldn't take Yibo with him too.

“Let's just go in my wheelchair” Xiao Zhan did a resigned expression and the nurse approached it to him. With her help, he sat on it, ready to go. For an instant, he took a look behind, where Yibo was sleeping like a baby and had wished for a few words with him before going. Still, he knew it was better like that so Yibo would still be sleeping at his arrival luckily.

However, he wasn't right and the scan took longer than planned so when Yibo woke up, he was alone on that bed. He looked around, wondering where Xiao Zhan was, yet he only found a nurse changing the sheets of his own bed. When she saw he was finally awake, she laughed. “The prince has opened his eyes!” she joked, making him frown. “C'mon, go to your bed so I can change this one too”

“Wait, where's Xiao Zhan?” Yibo asked confused, sitting on the bed before searching for his crutches.

“He has his scan early in the morning” the nurse helped him to change bed while answering.

“Why hasn't he waken me up?” Yibo muttered for himself, frowning bothered by that. “How long has he been in the scan?”

“Around an hour already” she removed all the sheets, doing her job diligently.

“That's not too long?” he got nervous all of sudden and the nurse noticed it.

“Sometimes tests can be longer than expected for no reason, so don't worry. I saw him before coming inside and he was fine, so just have breakfast while he's there” her words calmed him at that moment, but once his mind remembered how nervous he was last night, he felt horribly bad for not having been with him this morning. Maybe the bad feeling was contagious, but Yibo could feel something stank.

It just got worse when Xiao Zhan came back with tired face because scans were hard to handle due to the radiation. Immediately, Yibo asked him how it went, but behind him, the doctor came in too, his expression severely serious. “Okay, Xiao Zhan, I'm going to be direct because we shouldn’t wait any second more” when Yibo heard this, he knew something really bad was happening to him. “We've found an aneurysm in the part of your brain where the information is saved. It's already pretty big so I'm sure the pression is what provokes your amnesia. Aside of this, we need you to go under surgery as soon as possible. The process is through a catheter so it's not invasive. Still we need to do it quickly or you may suffer a stroke anytime” the doctor explained everything quickly and clearly. For Yibo, it was too much information, though. And for Xiao Zhan, it was just realizing why he had that bad feeling since yesterday. “If you agree to get the surgery, you need to sign these papers allowing the hospital” the doctor gave the documents to Xiao Zhan, who started to read them carefully.

“Doctor” meanwhile, Yibo spoke his doubts aloud. “How is this possible? I mean he has had a few scans already, why did you find it now?” he asked confused.

“When he fell, the hit on his head was so strong it entered the comma to repair itself. And even if he woke up, it was still too weak and fragile so this type of aneurysm or other brain injuries are common to appear after a long while in some cases. That's why he has had tests more often” the doctor explained carefully so Yibo would understand it. Still, panic filled his veins.

“Done” Xiao Zhan had signed every document, agreeing to the surgery and the doctor nodded.

“Perfect, the nurses will prepare you now, the sooner, the better” he said goodbye and left the room. Xiao Zhan started to be connected to a dropper again while Yibo only looked at him with madness in his eyes.

“I told you something was wrong” the person on that bed talked, feeling that gaze over him constantly. Yibo only approached on his sane foot.

“They will fix it and you'll be okay, right? Tell me you'll be” he begged, with his heart barely jumping out of his chest. And it was when Xiao Zhan understood one thing. Last night, he was scared of leaving him alone, but now who was scared was Yibo because after all, he didn’t want to be left alone. He wasn't scared of dying, he wasn't scared of ending that life. He was scared of being separated from Yibo now that he had found him, of allowing him suffer because he wouldn't be more in that world. He was scared of the pain he would suffer once again if he died first, without even starting a life together. That was why he needed to make him understand everything would be fine, no matter what.

“You know that to kill me I have to do it myself” he giggled, trying to release some tension. However, a doubt appeared in his mind. “Yibo, how did Lan Zhan died? When Wei Ying passed away, what happened to Lan Zhan?” Xiao Zhan needing to know before going away.

“He became mad” Yibo spoke, observing his horrified expression. “He broke the whole pavilion, he hurt himself, he broke rules and even fought against his own disciples. His uncle punished him so badly that he couldn’t recover after three years. Even after that, there was no day he wouldn't wait for Wei Ying to come back with him. Yet he never did. So twenty years after his loss, Lan Wangji broke the last rule of his life by committing suicide due to love” he told, remembering all those twenty years empty, just regretting and waiting something that would never come back. Probably, those were the darkest years of one of the most prominent disciples.

“You can't be serious...” Xiao Zhan spoke, having his tears almost falling.

“This is why you have to overcome this surgery and bring Xiao Zhan back, okay? Or I would do that over and over again until finding the life we can be finally together” Yibo threatened him, at first half joking, but ended up pretty serious. Xiao Zhan shook his head watching how the nurses started to move the bed.

“Don’t be stupid... I...”

“I’ll wait for you, you better come back this time” at that moment, Yibo approached the bed and lowered his head until kissing his soft lips for last time.

“I promise I will” Xiao Zhan muttered between them. Right after, Yibo had to move aside so they could take him to the operation room. As that man cried in the way to his surgery, another man stayed in the bedroom, sat on the mattress while crying all he couldn’t in the past. He didn’t know if he had become crazy because of him. If he had invented all that stuff about soulmates. Even if Xiao Zhan would remember him after coming back. He didn’t know anything, but one thing. And it was that he loved that man. So much his heart shook and tried to explode in thousands of pieces.

Hence, he was doing nothing but look at a clock all the time he was inside. It went by slower than a snail. Each minute looked as an hour. His patience was so limited so every time he saw a doctor or a nurse walking by their room, he asked how it was going. Still, none of them knew nothing as they had their own work to do. That didn’t help Yibo, who started to finish the nails from his hands. He didn’t know what else to so as nothing helped him not think about Xiao Zhan and the surgery. So he just waited doing circles around, sometimes in the room, other times in the hallway. Sometimes he even walked to the nurse department to ask them. However, he went so many times they told him if he appeared again, he wouldn’t have lunch. So he had to find another place to wander.

Then, when he had driven half of the hospital crazy, the bed with an unconscious Xiao Zhan appeared through the hallway and Yibo ran so fast that he almost fell with the crutches. “How was it?” he asked the doctor, who was accompanying the bed.

“The surgery was a success, but we have to wait for him to wake up and see if everything is correct” he explained with serious voice and for Yibo it was enough. He chased that bed during the whole path back, just watching a pale, asleep face that for sure wouldn't wake up in a really long while. However, now that he was beside Xiao Zhan, he felt more relaxed as long as he was still alive and safe. Yibo kept all night beside his bed, though. He slept over a chair, grabbing Xiao Zhan's hand just in case he would wake up, so he wouldn't be alone.

As always, Yibo continued sleeping when finally a pair of eyes regained consciousness after almost a whole day sedated. Then, Xiao Zhan took a look around him, being really disoriented, and found a man sleeping like a kid beside his bed. Still, he wondered why he didn’t sleep in his own bed that was two meters away. Still, he was bloody cute and he couldn't resist to touch his round cheek and surprisingly, that made Yibo wake up, discovering a gaze smiling at him. At that moment, Yibo would have jumped so high, he would have reached the heaven. Then, he couldn't ask anything but the most important thing.

“Are you back?” his hands surrounded Xiao Zhan's tightly, praying.

“Yes, I'm back”

**Author's Note:**

> I think I should explain the ending just in case it's too messy. When Xiao Zhan wakes up after the surgery, he has recovered his memories so now he's as Yibo. So it's a happy ending. Both live as Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan, but remembering the pasts of Lan Zhan and Wei Ying. It's indeed messy, I went wild with this one lol  
> Hope you enjoyed it at least!
> 
> Ps:: yes, it is zsww. I would have added smut, but I promised myself to stay low-key TT


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